Filthy Dirty Laundry Vol. 3 by Kailin Gow

Author:Kailin Gow [Gow, Kailin]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Amazon: B01MFI0OFO
Goodreads: 32896315
Publisher: Sparklesoup.com
Published: 2016-11-06T00:00:00+00:00

“Mom?” My head is throbbing and my eyes are bleary. “Is everything ok?”

“Is everything OK?” my mother trills off a laugh. “Of course everything's ok. In fact, everything's the best it's ever been.”

My mother's either ecstatic or horrendously depressed. Never anything in the middle.

“Oh. Ok. Good,” I say. What is it this time? A new lover? A Pomeranian?

“Remember how I always used to say I wanted to get married by an Elvis impersonator?”

“Uh...sure.”

“I did! We had a whole conversation about it – I can't believe you don't remember!”

“When was this, Mom?”

“Your twelfth birthday party! I had the Indiana Jones impersonator in...”

“Oh. Right.” The Indiana Jones impersonator was my mom's best friend, Roderigo. I heard he graduated to Han Solo.

“So annnyyyway,” she drags out the word. “I did.”

“You did what.”

“Got married! By an Elvis impersonator!”

“Wait – who?”

“His name's Paul – he's a friend of Roderigo's....”

It takes me a second.

“No, I mean...who did you marry, Mom?”

“It was the cutest wedding. So tacky. I love it. I always thought after the whole shebang with your father that I could never have a second big wedding.”

“MOM!” I almost scream. “Who did you marry.”

“Oh...you remember him!” my mother keeps on trilling. “We ran into one another a couple days ago. I was in LA to visit you, sweetheart, but you weren't at home. So I went walking around, visiting our old Beverly Hills haunts, and we just...ran into each other on Rodeo Drive. Alan, sweetie! And he's just the same, like you wouldn't believe! So handsome, so charming, so debonair, so....oh, you know, sweetheart. And one thing led to another and...we decided to really do it this time! No more “my ex wife this” or “complications” that. Just get married. What we always wanted. So Alan and I are finally wed. And I'm Mrs. Alan LaFleur.”

My heart drops into my stomach and then plummets to the floor. Am I ever going to escape the LaFleurs? Just when I thought Philip and I had overcome our first set of obstacles, an even bigger, grosser one has just started rolling straight into our way. My mother has just married Philip's father. Reunited the family that hates each other. Making me Kendall's step-sister once again. Bringing me even closer into the orbit of the family that seems to control absolutely every aspect and element of my waking life, whether I want them to or not. I will never be free of the LaFleurs.

This may be the worst thing that has ever happened to me.

“And you should see the rock he bought me, honey,” my mom continues. “I mean, it's big, it's HUGE. The biggest I've ever seen. Bigger than that piece of gravel your father got me.”

“Uh...” I hardly know what to say. “Um. Mazel tov?”

“I just knew you'd be thrilled! I just knew it! And now you can hang out with that lovely girl Kendall again – you two were always such good friends.”

I don't say anything. Tears well up in my eyes. My heart all but stops.

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